How Do You Learn To Trust Yourself?

Starting to learn how to trust ourselves is crucial for building self-confidence. But what does it mean to trust yourself more? What is trust?

Trust is the ability to rely on, to tell the truth, to depend on, to hope in, and to have strength in someone. What does that look like when we are beginning to learn how to trust ourselves? That looks like being able to rely on what you say to yourself. Do you keep your word? Are you constantly changing plans on yourself and not following through? What do you tell yourself? Do you speak truth and keep to it? Can you depend on you to do what you say you’re going to do?

When you make a plan to go to the gym once a week, do you keep it? Or when you say you won’t allow people to mistreat you, do you speak up for yourself the next time it happens? When we break our promises to ourselves, this tells us that we cannot depend on ourselves to be secure. Even when it doesn’t seem like a big promise, the message is the same, “I cannot be trusted with me.”

If you are wanting to learn how to trust yourself more, you are going to have to ask the hard questions. Are you dependable, are you reliable, can you trust yourself? Do you carry a strength in your voice and what you do for yourself? Learning to trust yourself looks like recognizing where you don’t trust yourself first.

Questions to identify how well you trust yourself:

• Do you trust yourself to make good decisions?
• Do you trust yourself to follow through with your plans?
• Do you follow through when you plan to make personal life changes?
• Do you trust yourself to be a safe place to process your pain?
• Does your body trust you to keep it safe from harm?
• Does your mind trust yourself to keep it in truth?
• Do you trust yourself to be your full self around anyone? To be true to yourself even when others are around
• Do you trust yourself to know when you need help?

What Does It Look Like Learn To Trust Yourself More?

Once you’ve identified where you don’t trust yourself, you can take those answers and ask, “why don’t I trust myself to make good decisions?” This could be that you have made some pretty bad choices in your life that have made big impacts on your life. When we experience pain from something, we might tell ourselves we are the reason for our pain. The lie of “I make horrible decisions” could easily slip in, along with shame and self-hatred.

These lies can come in as an adult and can also come in in our childhood. It’s important to know that when we believe a lie, we partner with the lie as our truth. Lies come from the enemy, which means when we partner with any lie, we are partnering directly with the enemy over that area of our life. This is a sneaky way the enemy tries to steal from our lives. If he can keep us in a lie, he can keep us from fully receiving from the Lord.

What we need to do is break partnership with the lie.

This can look like inviting the Lord in by saying “Lord, I invite you in. Speak truth and give me revelation of who You are and who I am in You.”

You can say “I break partnership with the lie that I make bad decisions for my life. God, I ask that You would drain this lie out of me now. God, what truth do You want to give me?”

Do this for each lie that came up when asking the questions above. Write down what you hear the Lord saying to you. Keep these truths in a place you can easily come back to and come back to them often. Coming back to them will remind you of what is truth. So when the enemy tries to come back and say “No, remember you can’t make a good decision. You should be seriously anxious because the decision you choose will drastically change your life for the worst. If fact, don’t even make a decision. Just let time go on and you’ll be better off.”, you can say, “No, God says I can make good decisions and that even if this ends differently than I’d like, I will be okay. God will not leave me.”

Walk It Out

What’s next after you break partnership with the lies? You learn to walk out those truths. And continually go back to the Lord and ask Him what He says about the things you fear. You build confidence in God and build your trust in Him. Learning to believe what He says about you because this is where we get Identity from. God will never lie to you. He will never be rude or dismissive. Because He is always kind, always loving, and always near. He is never condemning or shaming. He builds us up, not tear us down. Learning how God sees you will build how you see yourself.

And then, when you are able to see yourself as God sees you, you will begin to trust yourself in new ways. You will learn to trust that if God said you make good decisions, you are capable of making good decisions. And if God says that it’s okay to get it wrong, you will trust that when you get it wrong, you’re gonna be okay. You risk more, you believe in yourself more, and you build more confidence in yourself. When you know who God created you to be, and who you truly are at your core, you can more easily trust your intentions.

Learning to trust yourself is definitely a journey and it takes time to build trust. This was not the direction I was planning to go with this blog post, but I think without knowing God, it’s really hard to know who you are. We need to learn how to see ourselves and how God sees us, and that happens through spending time with Him. Asking Him questions and listening as He speaks.

Was This Helpful For You?

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Also, If you’re looking for resources, I have a basic step-by-step guide here on how to unpack triggers and connect with your heart.

If you are wanting to learn how to process pain and want to start a healing process for yourself, I am offering one-on-one coaching sessions. These sessions will help in learning how to process pain in a healthy way that actually brings lasting change and self-confidence.

I’m also creating a course that goes into the depths of all this as well. The course will take you step-by-step in how to walk through a healing journey. You will get live group coaching calls, a community of support, and one-on-one coaching with me. Also, subscribe to my email list to get updates for when the course is launched! If you have questions about anything, please reach out! I would love to chat with you via email.

You can email me at co*****@dy************.com with any questions you might have.