What do you do when you’re sad? Is it easy for you to feel the sad parts of your heart?

Often times we are walking around numb to our feelings because at some point in our life we decided that feeling emotions hurt too much. It feels really uncomfortable to be sad. Our bodies feel tired, we might feel down or heavy, and it might feel hard to reach out to someone and let them be there for you in your sad.

If you weren’t brought close and comforted when you felt sad as a child, you probably won’t know how to be in your feelings of sad as an adult. And it will probably feel hard or uncomfortable to ask for help. You are not alone in that if that’s you.

You might believe you have to solve big problems on your own, do hard things alone, or that people don’t actually want to be there for you.

Limited Perspectives

The truth is, the majority of our big belief systems come from our childhood where we experienced pain, and from our limited perspective, we created an assumption of what must have been true in the moment of pain. We believe things like “I’m unlovable”, “nobody wants to be there for me”, “I have to do this all by myself.” And the problem is, that when we have multiple experiences that tell that same perspective, they validate these belief systems.

And without a trusting, safe adult speaking the truth over us consistently, we are left to deal with our experiences all alone. But most of those beliefs were formed out of not knowing the full truth. We couldn’t see the whole picture as little kids. We needed help to see that even when someone chose to do something that hurt us, that doesn’t make it our fault and it doesn’t mean that we’re unlovable. It also doesn’t mean that that person who hurt us is bad. It just means that that person was hurting and they made choices that hurt us.

Our beliefs from childhood hold weight if we let them

The problem with these belief systems and these stories of pain that we hold, is that they don’t just go away over time. They follow us into adulthood and they become the core beliefs and thoughts that we sit on daily. And until we can identify the root of those pain points, we can never truly be free from the pain.

Lies sneak in when there is pain and there is no one speaking the truth over us. That’s why we need people who we can trust to speak the truth. We need to get to know God so we can see the truth of who He created us to be. We need God to speak truth into those places where we’ve been hurt and believed a lie.

Sadness is often hurt that is compounded with lies that have been built on overtime. When we begin to feel the sadness, we are also confronted with what we believe. And that can be painful to see and experience.

What Thoughts Are You Allowing In?

If you’re struggling with feeling sad, I challenge you to write out the thoughts you are thinking. What does sadness feel like in your body? What thoughts come up when you’re feeling sad? Those thoughts are all tied to pain. We need to be able to feel and see our pain so that it can be released from us.

Write down the thoughts and the beliefs that come up and then ask God to give you the truths for each thought. See whether what you are believing is lining up with what God is saying is true. You might be surprised by what He says.

Thanks For Reading Friend

Was this helpful for you? Leave a comment and tell me what intrigued you the most!

Also, If you’re looking for resources, I have a basic step-by-step guide here on how to unpack a trigger and connect with your heart.

If you are wanting to learn how to process pain and want to start a healing process for yourself, I am offering one-on-one coaching sessions. These sessions will help in learning how to process pain in a healthy way that actually brings lasting change and self-confidence.

I’m also creating a course that goes into the depths of all this as well. The course will take you step-by-step in how to walk through a healing journey. You will get live group coaching calls, a community of support, and one-on-one coaching with me. Also, subscribe to my email list to get updates for when the course is launched! If you have questions about anything, please reach out! I would love to chat with you via email.

You can email me at co*****@dy************.com with any questions you might have.